Non-practicing Catholic

I'm a Catholic and I haven't been to church for a long time. For Catholics, it's a taboo. But, I just happen to prefer talking to God in my own time and in private. I think I just put on a show when I pray in church. I get overly conscious like somebody's recording my silent prayer (paranoid!) so I can't really concentrate. Now, I don't know how to pray anymore. It's been a long time. I hope I can still remember how to do it.